


Child of Earth

by ObliviatedDream



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2017-07-31
Packaged: 2018-12-09 05:36:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11662689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObliviatedDream/pseuds/ObliviatedDream
Summary: A retelling of Andromeda, but with more focus on Ryder's mental health.Tags and rating may change as the story progresses.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> As the summary says, this will be focusing more on Ryder's health throughout the story. I really disliked how we had very little focus on how Ryder was handling things but others were asked many times throughout the game. 
> 
> I haven't put a multi-chapter story up here yet, so hopefully this will be something I can keep up with and others will enjoy.

**[Pathfinder HQ, After the Events of Meridian]**

 

“There is no higher power.”

The room went quiet. The arguments and whispers of those around her ceased as if a switch had been flipped, leaving the sound of various machines to hum and beep quietly in the background. They all turned to look at the Pathfinder.

“Why’s that, Ryder?” Suvi asked. Kavya had always been interesting to debate spirituality with.

Kavya, usually bubbly and cheerful, stood away from the group. Her voice was as icy as Voeld, arms crossed over her chest in a way that hinted she was trying to comfort herself more than distance the others.  “There is nothing after death. No god, no Heaven or Hell. No spirits, no reincarnation. You’re are free to keep your views and beliefs, but I saw  _ nothing _ when I died.”

They all looked at each other, trying to find words that would help comfort her. What do you tell someone who’s died multiple times?

She tried to shrug it off, but her eyes glazed over. “Maybe I don’t get an eternal paradise.” Her voice was dropping in volume. “Maybe it’s because I was brought back. You can debate as long as you want, but you’ll never be comforted by those beliefs in death.”

Lexi stood and reached for Ryder. “Come with me,” she took hold of the Pathfinder’s shoulder. “When was the last time you ate?”  Their voices trailed off and out of the Pathfinder HQ. 

Scott watched his sister leave. “How long has she been like that?”

“Since Habitat 7,” Liam said. “It got worse over time.”

“They shouldn’t have let her be Pathfinder.”

“There wasn’t much of a choice. Your father made sure of that.” Cora, arms crossed, said from her spot near a window. “I’m not sure anyone would have done better in her position.”

“Kid’s tough, though.” Drack spoke up. “She went through hell and back and is still standing.”

“But what happens when that strength fails her? Lexi may not tell us everything, but I know my sister. She’ll take the weight of the galaxy on her shoulders until it crushes her.” 

 


	2. The Beginning

**[Pathfinder HQ, After the Events of Habitat 7]**

 

“You were clinically dead for 22 seconds.”

The words rattled around in her head long after the Pathfinder team had arrived on the Nexus. Ryder struggled with those words, struggled with what she remembered. With what people had told her. 

_ You were clinically dead for 22 seconds... _

_ Where’s my father... _

_ He chose you… _

It was wrong. He should be here, still the Pathfinder. Scott out of cryo and blabbering on about ancient alien culture nonsense while she played in the ruins of the same alien tech they had found. They should be together, trying to become a family again. Their new start, in a new galaxy, on a golden world picked out just for them. Instead she was alone, bearing a title she wasn’t fit to use in a galaxy that wasn’t fit for them. Their "golden world" a volatile rock with hostile aliens.

“Ryder, are you listening to me?”

She forgot that Tann was rambling away at her, being brought back from her thoughts by his insistent grab for her attention. She forced herself to act involved.

“Yeah… Yeah. I am. The arks?” The truth was that she forgot what exactly they were talking about. 

“We need you to find them as soon as possible. There are thousands of colonists missing.”

“Understood.”

"But we were speaking of the murder case. As I was saying, I would like to be done with it, but if you think you can find more information I will allow you to pursue it further."  Tann paused, watching her with his big bug-like eyes.  She knew he was scrutinizing her. She stared back warily, waiting to see what his tactic would be this time. 

“I just want to say, I am sorry about your father.” 

Ah, there it was. Sympathy. She only nodded in response. 

“I imagine he put good faith in you, Ryder. I hope to see great things from you.”

“Thank you.” Her voice was rough, monotonous. She tried to fake sincerity. Director Tann just didn’t seem important enough to work for it. He gave her bad vibes, she’d tell others.

"That's all I wanted to talk to you about. I'll be leaving for Eos now."  Ryder didn’t bother to wait for a formal dismissal or any more bland pleasantries from Tann and walked out of the door. She wanted to get away from him. From here. Her ship was waiting in the docking bay. Escape was so close.

But then there was Cora, standing between her and the tram. 

The other woman gave her a smile, “Ready to see what they have waiting for us?”

She wasn’t interested in fake camaraderie from Cora. Ryder knew she resented her father’s choice. Being trained to be the Pathfinder’s second was important to her, but now it didn’t matter so long as Ryder was filling the position she wanted. 

“I hear good things.” Kavya tried, putting forth no effort to seem friendly or interested. 

Cora must've taken the hint. They rode in silence to the docking bay.

* * *

_ Cora, Liam, Lexi, Kallo, Suvi, Vetra.  _

She repeated their names in her head as the ship flew through the stars towards Eos. An exercise from their resident doctor to keep her core memory in shape. Kavya already struggled with names. Dying hadn’t done her any favors. Only now sometimes she couldn't remember anything she just witnessed. 

_ Cora, Liam, Lexi, Kallo, Suvi, Vetra.  _

**_Ryder, I could help you remember things._ **

She jumped at the sound of SAM’s computerized voice. It still startled her to have it in her head. It also angered her. SAM, while important for the Initiative, had been a source of resentment. It had stolen what little of her father’s attention she had had back in the Milky Way. 

“I don't need your help.”

_ Cora, Liam, Le- _

**_I am not here to harm you. It would not be beneficial for either of us._ **

A groan. “Well, you're definitely  _ not _ helping now.”

_ Cora, Li- _

**_My apologies._ **

A frustrated groan. “Forget it. I’ll just use nicknames or something.”

The door to her room opened with a quiet  _ whoosh  _ followed by her footsteps on the rungs of the ladder to the second level. Their arrival to Eos was imminent and she wanted to see what they were working with as soon as possible. If it was anything like Habitat 7, her job was going to be hell.  The navigation controls rose up to meet her as she stepped into the room. Eos was rapidly growing in front of her as they approached the planet. 

Kavya was vaguely aware of her crew talking in the background, but all she could focus on was Eos, haloed by the system’s star. She squinted at it, unintelligible words floating around her in warbled waves. They were all directed at her. She didn't understand.

"What...?"

"I said, a lot of people have their hopes pinned on us. They gave up on Eos."

Kavya jumped, stepping away from the console and turning towards Liam. When had he showed up?  


"Can't blame them. Expected a golden world. Instead they saw their friends die. Never know how that'll affect..."

She averted her gaze as Liam trailed off. This wasn't a conversation she wanted to have.   


"Sorry," he sighed out. "You okay?"

_ No. Why would I be okay? I'm hearing things now. _  "I'm fine! I'm excited! New planets to scout out." Maybe too much cheerfulness on that, but deflection wasn't a new skill for her. She forced a smile. "What about you, Kosta? Ready for this?"

Liam took the bait. "More than ready. This is what we're here for, right? We can do this. You can do this." 

"Pathfinder?" Kallo called out to her. "The  _Tempest_ checks out. We're good."

With a nod to Liam, she turned back to the console. Her eyes roamed over the planet's surface once more. Whatever had overwhelmed her earlier had passed. Orbiting Eos would offer her no more answers. Kavya took a deep breath, let it out, inhaled another. 

"Take us down."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These chapters should get longer the further into the story I get. For now, I leave you with this.


End file.
